New Dish Night

When Steve and I were dating I started doing a thing called New Dish Night. I used it as a way for me to make new dishes I have never made before and improve my cooking skills at the same time. Back then we used to do it on Friday nights and get a movie and just stay in and relax after a long work week. However as much as I like the idea it seemed to only work during the slow times at his job, since he worked in student activities he was always busy with that or Masters classes. Then Miss Kennedi was on her way and new dish night became Hello GBMC Night, and before you knew it I stopped doing it all together.

Well Steve and I have a favorite restaurant in Towson, MD called Kathmandu Kitchen. They have the best indian food I have even had since moving to the United States. If you don't know about my cultural background let me just share a little bit. I was born in Trinidad. My entire family (father, mother and siblings) moved here in 1996. If you don't know anything about Trinidad do some research you might find something interesting but we have a huge Indian culture and influence in food and religion, I don't know too many Trinis that don't eat curry. We love us some sorry. Any how, when I found the place I was so happy and it was another way to share some of my culture with Steve. Plus it was one of the only places I could eat and the food stay down when I was having Kennedi.

As a matter of fact we got engaged there.

That's a picture of us sitting at the table Steve said we got engaged at. I said it was the table behind him. LOL. Anyhow when we would go there I would always order the same dish. I would always get the Chicken Tikka Masala and it would come with this amazing rice and this wonderful cream sauce that you could pour on the rice and eat, OMG, its making me hungry now just blogging about it. Its an amazing dish and you don't have to worry about the curry or spices because its chicken marinated in yogurt and spices and then its cooked in a tomato and cream sauce. Well two days ago I thought about our favorite restaurant and since we live in Winston Salem now I know I wouldn't be getting this food. So I thought - New Dish Night! I decided to look up the recipe online and make the dish myself. Yes I am making my second indian dish. I have already made curry chicken before. I am so excited. I couldn't believe that I found the recipe on for it. I can't wait to make it. Tomorrow is the big day and I will have to be sure to post pictures of the finished dish. Here's to hoping its just as good as theirs.

The Submissive Wife.
Nickida

That's a picture of the dish. I hope mines looks as good.

P.S. Here is the link to the recipe on allrecipes.

What Happened to Families - Is Marriage Becoming a Thing of the Past?

Last night while watching Let's Talk About Pep (the new show on VH1 with Pepper from Salt and Pepper) my husband and I started to talk about how families are starting to be a thing of the past and how now it seems that more women are choose to pursue a career and not a family. Jacque Reid is apart of the cast and she was talking about how badly she wanted a child but she wasn't in a relationship that was leading to marriage. Her GYN convinced her to ask an ex-boyfriend or a close male friend to father a child with her since she was getting older and her risks involved with pregnancy was increasing greatly. This made me think when did we stop thinking about having or starting families in lieu of careers? I started to think of my friends and realized that I am in the minority being married that its more the norm and common place to be single and dating that it is at my age (27) to be married with children.

I remember when I was a little girl I wanted to be so many things but the one thing I knew I wanted to be was a mother. Is this the problem though, is it that so many families now don't come with fathers that we are forgetting them all together? I grew up with both my parents, married and they are still married to this day. I knew I wanted to be married and have children too. Who doesn't? That's what I use to think when I was younger but now things have seemed to change. So I ask what happened to our families? Are the single parent homes a reason why? The low number of men available? Our drive and determination to be successful not matter what? Being picky? There are so many reasons why it could be. CNN says according to the US Census that 45% of black women have never been married. That's a huge number and a scary one at that. So it makes me wonder even more if marriage becoming a thing of the past? Will it become taboo one day to say you are married? Why don't more people want to or choose to get married?

Is society to blame for this shift in the way of life? How has pre-marital sex affected relationship and marriage? I think I have hundreds of questions and very few answers, like I stated earlier I am in the group of people that are married but I fear soon that we will really be a minority. What do I have to look forward to with my son and daughter? When she is my age with people still be getting married? I think its time for families to start to make a comeback. There is no joy in the world like watching my kids grow up. I get to see what my parents felt like when they had me. To see them learn first words, first steps, teething, potty training, first day of school and prom, these are things that I wouldn't trade any thing in the world for but could it be easy for me to say that since I have it. If I had never experienced it before would I say that same? Don't get me wrong I don't have a problem with anyone who just don't want kids or a husband at all. There's nothing wrong with that, but why wait till you are 40 to now decide I must have a baby today and I can figure out where the husband is coming from later. If you were a man would you father a child with female friend just so she could be a mother? What role would you then play in this child's life? Do you sign away all rights? Whose responsibility is it to raise that child? What happens if you get married later and have to explain it to your other children? On that note I will end here today. I think I am gonna keep this topic going for a while. I want to know more about this. If you are single and don't plan on getting married soon or just wants kids please feel free to speak.

The Submissive Wife

Holding On For Dear Life

Facebook has become a major part in lots of people's daily lives. Its apart of our daily routines now, like bathing and brushing our teeth, we just have to find the time to check our facebook. I know this to be true because that is the case for me. My husband even added net to my phone so that I could check it on the road when we are making our long trips back to Baltimore to visit my family and our friends. There are hundreds, maybe even thousands of apps on the site, more things to occupy your time even more and pull you in even further. There is something for everyone to have fun and stay connected to our family, our old friends and new friends and now our gaming friends (who I know from experience can become some very good friends).

A friend of my post a comment on her wall from an app called God Wants You to Know. I found it so though provoking and blog worthy I knew I had to write about it. Here's the thing I have been avoiding it for a bit. This is the second time this same app has encouraged me to come here so I decided to add the app for myself. Today I am not writing on what it shared with me thus far even though I am sure I will in the near future I think I have to write about how this post indirectly affected me.

Here is the post the app gave her: "that joy will come when you pass on the love you have received. If you hoard love, it melts away. If you lock love, it breaks free. If you grab on to love, you end up holding an illusion. When you let love flower in its own way, it stays to support you. When you pass on love, it multiplies beyond measure."

Now this can be viewed in so many different ways but when I read it something about it spoke to my childish ways. I know we can all think of a time when we were dating someone and thought that person was our life. We though that if we didn't have them the world would end and we just couldn't deal with that. Have you ever choked love before? This made me think of when I was dating my husband. We were good friends and shared alot with each other. He may not like me telling the story but when we met he liked me first but when I met him I was grabbing on to another love so tight I could feel it slipping from my fingers everyday but still I held on for deal life. I didn't want to let go, all I thought about was the fact that we had been dating for some time and I didn't want to start over again. My heart was breaking in so many ways but I still wanted lock this love to me.

I think now that God did that because really he wasn't ready for my love either it would be years before we started dating. I remember it like it was yesterday. It hit me like an epiphany, I had feelings to this man and I was becoming attracted to him beyond a friendship level. The thing is when I was ready he wasn't and it took work and true honest and self reflection for us to be where we are now. We both had to learn things with each other and about each other to allow the other person's love to grow into its own. We are still learning and growing in love and with the help of God and our continuous prayers we are getting much better at it. But think about it. Have you ever held on to love so tight to get what you wanted? Did you ever hold on for dear life? Did you hold on to someone that has broken free of your grasp? How are you now sharing love to benefit you? I often ask myself if I had to at this point would I let love go to see if it returns. My answer is yes. I love my husband with all my heart and I will have to trust that he will always choose me. He did it once and I believe he will do it forever. I will always be his choice and he mine.

The Submissive Wife.